Wednesday, September 19, 2007

mY heaRt huRts

He has no idea how much my heart hurts now. Telling him those words already broke my heart. And just.. Was over the phone with him. Didn't end well. My heart felt as if it was ripped apart. He sounded as if he has gotten over it. But i haven't.. I guess matters of the heart matters a lot to me and i do take a long time to get over it. He never left my mind eventhough i say i'm okay. If only he knew how i feel. SIGH. But there's nothing that i can do to change things now. Since he has already let go and i also have then.. Guess getting over it is the best.

Feeling super tired. Slept during the 2 papers today. Have been having insonmia for the past fews weeks and it seems like it's getting worse. Sleep very late in the night, wake up early for school and feel totally exhuasted when i get to school. I guess there's just too many thngs on my mind and can't get my mind to rest also. I'm drained already. My chest pains are coming back again. Today during the first paper i was in pain. Could barely breathe.Signs of ageing? Anyway, it was better than taking those medicines the other time. It made my stomach even weaker than it is.

Tomorrow is a rest day for me. No school! But somehow i wish there was. At least i can get to have a glimpse of him. Though my heart is crying in silence,there seems no turning back to my decision. Oh.. where was i. Oh yes, tomorrow.. I'll be going out in the evening. Meeting Jasmine for dinner. After that we'll be dropping by at Cheryl's house. Exciting! Can't wait to get out of the house, really. At least i can get my mind of things and not be so stressed.

"If i could turn back time, i will make you mine. Please stay by my side, till the end of time. If you see me cry, will you hold me tight? Don't walk away, cause my heart's already in pain."