Waking up was really tough for me this morning. Not because i was really tired. I had a dream while i was asleep. I can still remember the dream vividly now even as i close my eyes. It's kind of hard to put in into words. But basically, it was a dream of me, not that i like to dream about myself, and no matter what i want to do, i will still fail. In the dream, there were my dream to be a singer, my family and my studies. I was awaken from this dream by my handphone's alarm. And when i woke up, i realised that i couldn't move and my back was hurting like crazy. Suddenly, i felt like a complete failure again. I immediately dropped Cindy a message saying that i may not be able to help out today because of my back. After that, i closed my eyes and prayed in my heart because somehow i couldn't exactly talk as well. And before i know it, i fell back to sleep. And again, i had another dream. Well, i can't remember what the second dream was. But i guess it wasn't good cause when i work up, my whole eyes swelled. I laid in bed for another hour, praying in my heart. I knew that some regrets from the past are rushing back to me. And i really don't want to be overwhelmed by them again. I want to move on. I made a loud cry in my heart and then i felt a release. Thank God. Although i had a tough morning, the rest of the day was great just by staying at home.
Ever since Sunday's service, my mum hasn't scolded me or chased me out of the house. I pray that this will continue. Perhaps she's been in a good mood. Hopefully this will last. Now, in my heart, i'm really feeling very happy. Although things hasn't been going the way i have been hoping the past 18 to 19 years, i just thank God that i am able to experience His goodness throughout my life. It hasn't been easy, but God has always been faithful.
Alritey, i'm going to go watch some shows already. See ya! :)
